Tired

Of course I'm tired. After cleaning up some stuff, I ended up going to bed at 2. Six hours of sleep is not enough to cover for the night before. Can't believe I had the guts to work today.

Just another work day. Got some stuff that boss was gonna trash. She doesn't give me everything she's gonna trash, though. (Afraid I'd leak her work or something?) And eat-out-with-brother's gang day. Yesterday's 2 fast food meal with no veggies is not making me feel good. Again, no veggie today. I'm feeling very weird...

As usual, niece N was glued to me at my computer. I was showing her Pinky sites, and then I slowly dosed off. I was loosing control of the cursor. I wonder if she noticed. (She must have.) As soon as they left, I collapsed at my desk. After a 30-minute nap, I was well enough to take a shower.

I've been half dead all day.

Another batch of online order arrived. It's the feather charms. Very pretty. Too bad not all of them have a loop on both ends. I'll have to figure out some way to hang them.

Cross-border shopping

Tagged along with brother's gang. It's been a while... since last time I cost them Costco's closing time.

Brother was aiming at leaving the house at 7:30, yet his BBQ party guests didn't leave until midnight. With cleanup and everything, they ended up going to bed at 1. Sis-in-law couldn't sleep probably because of stress.

I've been busy online with purchases and searches (coupons and list of stores for the trip). By the time I went to bed, it was 5. (T_T) Tossing and turning for gods-know-how-long. Took a look at the alarm clock, it was 6:15! Afterward it was nothing but to wait for the alarm to ring. Of course I beat to clock to it. Didn't not get any sleep at all. (T_T)

Arrived at brother's slightly after 7:30. Turn out he wasn't ready. We left the house at 8:10. Lineup wasn't that bad. About 30 minutes or so? I left my cell phone at home which is also my watch, so I lost all sense of time today. Should remember to wear a watch next time.

We got to the first store at around 9:30. 2 rounds of clothing shopping for the girls. They grow so fast, they're outgrowing the clothes they bought at back-to-school. Then Joann. Got some beading supply but not exactly what I'm looking for. Just some common stuff. Got those 7mm pompoms too, yay~!!!

Then lunch at a certain Walmart. (I had no idea which malls... all day.) The 3-items-for-$10 bucket is a good deal. Quality is appropriate to the price, though. We bought a big bottle of juice so the meal only cost $14 for all 5 of us.

Then... more clothes shopping for the girls. It was... either Target or K-mart or Ross... Can't remember. Somewhere we went past another small Joann but gave it up. Then it was Michael's. But this branch was like after a big hurricane. Things were a mess and not replenished. Still managed to get some stuff thanks to an online 50% coupon. Thanks my brother and 2 nieces for helping me use them.

Next was... some other store? Then another Michael's. This one was much better with more stuff and more organized.

Let's see... we stopped at 2 Michael's, 1 Johann, 2 Walmart, 1 Target, 1 K-mart, 1 Ross, 1 Kohl's, 1 Costco... I think I missed some.

Had dinner at Costco. I got a hotdog. The ice-cream mom requested was the last thing to buy. The lineup back wasn't too bad either. 30 minutes maybe? Geeze... I'm totally lost in time.

Arrived at home around 9:30. Sooooo tired and sleepy....

I brought along a Pinky but didn't take any Pinky pictures. Awwww... All day, the only picture I took was the infamous "press button, receive bacon" hand dryer. I think that was at Walmart. Those dryers are not very common over here.

Fall colours

Very pretty indeed. Thanks A! (^_^)

Gloomy

Gloomy weather all day.

Part of dad's collection of home-made fake canes from mutilating perfectly good umbrellas. There are at least 2 more downstairs. At least. (OK one of them here is a real cane.)

Down

(Picture was taken last June and unrelated to subject.)
No work today but my tummy feels worse than yesterday. Slept in. Recorded some recent purchases. Sent mail to that Chinese seller. Set up some shared purchases with sis-in-law, searched for some pictures for ideas... Didn't get to work on anything again... (T_T)

The heat is still not running although it feels so cold. I'm in full winter home clothes. (Fleece pants + ski pants on top. Fleece long sleeve shirt. Fleece jacket.) Go ahead and laugh at me.

The sun did come out for a little while late afternoon. But forecast is all rain. I'm worried about the basement flooding again.

Reading this photocopy posted on my chiropractor's cork board sends my heart to Siberia. It explains why I'm so negative. If only my parents knew this list. (T_T)

Chewy Cranberry Apple

President's Choice Chewy Cranberry Apple Granola Bars. Picture taken May 2008!!!! Yikes! I have way too many "stocked up" old pics...

Anyway, this one is missing a note, so I can't remember too well how it tasted. The bars were small, and I think they were OK for their price. Nothing too yucky, nothing too special.

Worthlessness

Yup, the vampire definitely affects everything. The weather compounds it.

My boss was not in a good mood either. Very irritable.

She told me to clean up some resin cast clocks, and then mount them on a stick for spray-painting. Usually it's the back that gets sprayed first. I just want to make sure. But what she's been saying was "dial forward". "Forward" to me means facing me, but that's unusual. I should have confirmed louder, but I didn't say "dial up?" loud enough. She didn't say anything so I stuck them all facing up.

When she was about to spray them, she got mad. It could be simply a misunderstanding on both of us, but she always act like she's god and cannot be wrong. I said, you said dial up. She said, no, YOU said dial up. Wait a sec... if you heard me saying that, why didn't you correct me right away? I of course had to shut up.

She wanted me to punch out some printed clock dials with a paper punch. Only the "clear ones". Meaning, only the once with clearly visible numbers. That, was also questionable. What she consider "clearly visible" was different from mine.

All of these unnecessary stress and tension.

Somewhere she said, "why am I even explaining this to you?"

It really hurts.

Do you know what that means to me?

It means, I'm not worthy to know why something needs to be done a certain way. I should just shut up and blindly do what you say like a robot. I'm not a person.

The stress maxed out within a short duration of less than 5 minutes and I needed to use my emergency stop button. My arm is still sore from it.

As I sunk my teeth deeply onto my arm, I had to tell myself, I'm just a piece of garbage. No, less than that. A piece of shit. So I should shut the F%#K up and be her dog.

I have no doubt she thinks of me as her dog.

All afternoon, I was thinking, will today be the day I finally quit? I've saved up 2 incidents, past misunderstanding that would slap her in her face. I was imagining how delicious it would be, the day I reveal them to her.

However, the mixed message is, she does look like she's been trying to help me with my own craft stuff. If it isn't for that, I would have quit long ago.

BTW, some more online stuff arrived. 2 more to go. I must contact that Chinese seller as my order status is still "paid" instead of "shipped" after a whole week now.