Sunday, May 06, 2012


Picked A up from the airport, took Pinky pictures of all the chocolate bars he brought back. Wish I had more Pinkys on me. Went grocery-shopping with him, came back and made some crapes for dinner. Sifting the flour didn't help. Ended up squishing the lumps with the back of a spoon. Kind of works. Still made a mess by burning the crape and left tough burnt-on black patches on the fry pan.

L asked for my mailing address through e-mail. It must be for the wedding invite. I'm really in no condition to go, so I tried to discourage him from sending me one. Seems like that's the only thing on his mind. He ignored my other greetings and questions, and kept insisting that I send him my address. I hesitated. Then he got mad at me. Sigh... oh yes, I'm the biggest failure in this world. Everyone hates me. God hates me. At the end, I took a huge risk telling him that I'm going through an extreme retreat phase and will be seeing a doctor in a few days. No more reply form him, at least none tonight. Let's see if I've driven away yet another friend. Or, the whole world rejects me. I'm not allowed to have any friends.

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